who took my weekend?
Someone stole my weekend, and I think I know who. That little punk Festivus. Sundays are so melancholy for me, and its even worse today because the weekend feels like it was cut a day short because I was guilted into the funfest eastman concert crap. Believe me when I say I do not like to go sit, stand or anything else in front of J Fred Johnson stadium with about 2.8 billion strangers. Factor in keeping up with three small children, spending outrageous sums of money to buy food from a tent(which one can buy any other time of year from said proprietors making a killing from said tents). I was also irked by the 5.00 admission price to see washed up performers. That brings me to the bathroom situation. If you, or your small children felt the urge come upon you, you had to satisfy that urge in one of only 5 waste management port o potty's. There is nothing like the old outhouse on wheels, or standing in a line 45 minutes to use it, and when you finally get in it, you have picked the one where some sick, disgusting person had the balls to actually take a dump. Could you take a dump in a chemical toilet closet, covered every square inch in piss and feces, with half of Kingsport lined up 5 feet away waiting to also go. Myself, my rectum would close up for a good month.
Now for a life affirming shout out about funfest. This lady was there with an ecampment(funfest term, meaning a tarp layed out with chairs right in the way of foot traffic, and people looking pissed if you step on their tarp) of quadroplegic citizens in wheel chairs, on oxygen. Their were 4 total. The latin term to describe that lady is cojones majores. Bringing people like that to be at the mercy of that little sun bastard Festivus.
One thought that crossed my mind while enduring this chines water torture is that some people live for this, and plan their vacations for this. For example, the Browders. Funfest makes them downright frisky. I believe Al was conceived during funfest 1982 or so.
I must now go lay down and conserve life essence. Til the next time, may the life essence be with you.
Now for a life affirming shout out about funfest. This lady was there with an ecampment(funfest term, meaning a tarp layed out with chairs right in the way of foot traffic, and people looking pissed if you step on their tarp) of quadroplegic citizens in wheel chairs, on oxygen. Their were 4 total. The latin term to describe that lady is cojones majores. Bringing people like that to be at the mercy of that little sun bastard Festivus.
One thought that crossed my mind while enduring this chines water torture is that some people live for this, and plan their vacations for this. For example, the Browders. Funfest makes them downright frisky. I believe Al was conceived during funfest 1982 or so.
I must now go lay down and conserve life essence. Til the next time, may the life essence be with you.
